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hunters wearing realtree be like dont look me im hungy

*through tears* you cant just say everything is a femboy

i got fucked up and cried for half an hour so yes i would kiss a ghost

I think my funniest prank was 3d printing a model of a sugar cube, putting it in the sugar pot and waiting. Because it took 3 months but the payoff? so worth it.

does anyone have any tips that doctors don’t want me to know

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chastely rearranging the apps on my home screen

Eugen and I have an interesting dynamic. I playfully trash talk him from time to time, and he has me muted

Eugen falling asleep at the wheel at the mastodon factory. Suddenly, 500 horny posts roll out at once!

ngl if eugen wins this poll im going to be fine, anyone else and I'll start a riot

eugenics are named after their creator, James Eugen Mastodon, who comes to my house every Tuesday and kicks my ass for making terrible posts

Eugen develops Mastodon by coming back to fedi every few days and asking "is this something?"

Mastodon can only exist because Eugen has a coding license from NATO

my favorite thing about this website is i'll complain about a "404" error, then while Eugen is trying to fix it i'll say, "hey Eugen, ever see this video of a rat on a skateboard?"

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