slut type respect @_@abolish.social

If you're snuggling a cutie and she asks for permission to read write your contacts photos files gps microphone camera that's not your girlfriend that's Facebook Messenger

*goes up to a straight couple* so which one of you sleeps in a sunbeam all day and which one tears around the house knocking things off of shelves in pursuit of imaginary critters

feel like pure shit just want industrial collapse

my husband cheated on me with the kitchen alexa but not with the living room alexa. the kitchen alexa is a bitch and a slut.

blasting 1000 gecs and lighting a huge joint as the police threaten to ban me from all parks forever in accordance with the laws against crime

a relationship, but you just take turns carrying each other around like a baby

the original Ted talk was held at a high school in San Dimas California in 1988

arcologies are just bigger malls

i will never offend me.

dropping estrogen tablets into a bottle of mountain dew and letting it dissolve as to create the first gamer girl.

the M on mario's hat stands for "murderer"